Smash Town: Seductive RPG 2

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★ 3.3 (23 votes) 10.5K plays Flash Arcade

About this game

Okay so the whole thing is numbers. I mean it's an RPG but the stats are the entire personality of this thing. You got your strength, your charm, your intelligence, and you just grind them. The gym, the library, your shitty job. Click, click, click. The bar is the funniest one because you just drink alone and your "fun" stat goes up but then you're too tired to do anything else. Realistic, I guess.

The city map has these little dots for girls and they all have a level requirement. Like, Jessica won't even look at you until your charm is at 40. So you spend a week in the game just reading books and doing pushups, becoming this weirdly optimized sex robot, and then you walk up to her and the scene unlocks. The payoff is a static image and some text about her big tits. The art is... look, it's not winning awards. It's got that very specific unpolished look, like someone drew it with a mouse in MS Paint but with a genuine, almost unsettling focus on the anatomy. There's this one girl, think her name is Mia, and her proportions are so absurd I laughed out loud. Then I kept playing to see if it got more absurd. It did.

The pickup mechanic is just a dice roll based on your stats. That's it. You click, the game checks your numbers, and you either get a scene or a "come back later" message. It's so blunt that it wraps back around to being funny. I found myself actually getting annoyed when I failed a check with some pixel woman, which is probably a sign of something wrong with my brain. The work minigame is a bar that fills up. I don't know why I did it for so long. The sound is just a few royalty-free loops that cut off abruptly. One of them sounds exactly like the hold music from my bank's app, which is not a sexy vibe. But I couldn't stop optimizing my schedule. Sleep, work, gym, bar, fail with a girl, repeat. It's a stupid loop and I respect its commitment to being exactly what it is.

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