Undress poker with Jasmine

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★ 3.7 (138 votes) 10.3K plays Flash Arcade

About this game

Jasmine's got this thing she does with her left eyebrow when she's bluffing. Or maybe it's her right. I spent three hands trying to figure it out and completely tanked my chip count because honestly, the stockings were distracting. She wears them like she knows exactly what she's doing, which is the whole point I guess. The poker itself is the most basic five card draw you can imagine. Hold, discard, draw. The kind of thing you'd find preloaded on a burner phone from 2007. But you're not here for the poker.

The video unlocks are tied to beating her chip stack in rounds, and the first time she loses a significant pot she does this little sigh and the jacket comes off. It's not smooth. The transitions between her idle animation and the video clips are jarring, like someone edited them together in Windows Movie Maker and said "good enough." Which, honestly, adds to the charm. There's no attempt to hide that this is a real model in front of a camera, and the whole thing has the energy of something shot in an apartment with a ring light and a dream. Her name's Jasmine. She's skinny, brunette, and the description wasn't lying about her tits. They're the star of the show once the striptease progresses past the initial shy girl act.

The interface options are a nightmare if you actually need them. No contrast settings, no text scaling, the card faces are small and the hold buttons are these tiny little circles that I kept missing on my phone. I fat fingered a discard on a pair of jacks and she just smirked at me. That smirk. I don't know if it was scripted or if she was genuinely amused by my incompetence. The sound design is just... absent. There's a click when you press things and then silence until a video plays. I wish there was some terrible royalty free jazz or something to fill the void while I'm losing. But there won't be. The game is what it is. The later videos get more explicit, touching, the usual escalation. She has this one clip where she's looking directly at the camera and I forgot I was supposed to be playing cards. That's probably the review right there.

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