About this game
The first thing that hits you is how the dealer looks like she just walked out of a cheap perfume commercial from 2004. That blonde, the one in the red lace thing that probably cost more than my rent, she's dealing cards with this smirk that says she knows exactly what you're here for. And she's not wrong. The game is poker, basic five card draw, nothing fancy. You win a hand, she loses a piece of clothing. Lose, and you get to watch her do this little victory shimmy that's more insulting than sexy, honestly.
The weird part is the fangs. There's this whole vampire motif slapped on top, like someone had two separate ideas and just mashed them together. Clap fangs to slice the poker combination, the description says. I still don't know what that means. You click these little fang icons sometimes and it does... something to the cards? I think it's supposed to be a wild card mechanic but half the time I just clicked randomly and still won. The brunette model shows up later, and there's this one video loop where they're both on screen doing this awkward lesbian tease that looks like neither of them wanted to actually touch each other. The camera work is what you'd expect from a phone propped on a stack of books.
I wish they'd leaned harder into the strip part. The striptease bits are too short, just a few seconds of grainy video before it cuts back to the card table. You barely get to appreciate the lingerie before it's gone. And the arcade mode, whatever that's supposed to be, just shuffles you back to the same three opponents. I kept playing though. Not because it was good, but because I wanted to see if the blonde's bra would actually come off or if the game would chicken out. It doesn't. But by then you've sat through so many loading screens that the payoff feels like finding a dollar in old jeans. Not nothing, but not exactly a jackpot.