The Mating Season

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★ 3.8 (13 votes) 10.2K plays Instant Play

About this game

Getting April O'Neil's top off shouldn't feel like debugging a Unity asset flip at 3 AM but here we are. The Mating Season throws you into some cartoon sewer nonsense with the redhead reporter and honestly the first click works. She's there. She's got that old school TMNT parody look. Then you click again and the whole thing stutters like it's trying to remember what a breast is. I laughed. Not at the joke. At the jiggle physics having a seizure.

The humor is there I guess. Some dialogue pops up that's trying real hard to be cheeky about turtle mating habits which, fine, whatever, I'm not here for the writing. I'm here to see April in increasingly compromised positions. The art has that cheap Flash animation vibe, not in a charming way but in a "I downloaded this from Newgrounds in 2006" way. And I mean that as a compliment. Sort of. The colors are flat and her proportions make no anatomical sense. One frame her neck is longer than her entire torso. It's beautiful garbage. But then the game forgets what it's doing. You're clicking and suddenly nothing happens. No feedback. No progression. Just April staring at you with her one wonky eye while the background music loops that same five second clip. I wanted to like the brokenness but the brokenness didn't want to cooperate.

There's a moment where her shirt phases through her shoulder. Not clipping. Phasing. Like it achieved a higher plane of existence. I wish the whole game committed to that energy. Instead it just sort of stops delivering scenes right when things get explicit. The tag says hentai but it's more like a striptease that got bored of itself. The redhead is there. The parody is there. The actual payoff is hiding somewhere in the code and I couldn't find it. Maybe that's the real mating season. A long frustrating search with no climax.

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The game’s a kinetic novel so you’re just along for the ride, no choices, no branching paths. That might sound like a complaint but honestly, Eddie’s such a passive wet noodle of a protagonist that giving him agency would feel wrong. He’s checking his phone during meetings, seeing his wife’s descent into, well, being a total slut for loan sharks, and his main reaction is to pop a boner for the first time in months. The erectile dysfunction as a plot device is handled with all the subtlety of a brick through a window. At one point Rachel’s describing how her boss made her stay late and Eddie’s just there, hand down his pants, finally hard again. It’s messed up. The voyeurism tag is doing heavy lifting here because you’re not participating, you’re just watching a marriage implode through a screen, which is probably the point. The AI art is a whole thing. Sometimes Rachel looks like three different women in three consecutive scenes. 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Comments (1)

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U have to hit the 3 lines on the player to make the sound work. Before u full screen it -- if on mobile smartphone. I am.