About this game
Metro Strip Poker. Right. Because when I'm on the tram at rush hour, nothing gets me going like a blonde pole dancer in lingerie challenging me to cards. This is a browser game, no download, just click and... well, it's there.
The setup is laughable. You're on a subway car, and this real model type starts stripping. The poker itself is basic as hell. Five card draw, but the AI folds if you sneeze too loud. I won three hands in a row without even looking at my cards once. The striptease animations are what you're here for, obviously. She removes a piece of lingerie with each loss. The train keeps moving in the background, completely empty except for you two. Nobody else ever boards. Where is this tram going? Who cares.
The model is attractive, I'll give it that. Blonde, fits the tag. But the whole thing feels like it was coded in an afternoon by someone who just discovered what a jpeg is. There's no polish. The cards snap into place with zero animation. The sound is just... a loop of train noises. After five minutes you've seen everything. She ends up topless, game over, congrats. Then it resets. No variation. No different dialogue. Same five hands of poker. I wish there was at least a different background or maybe another character to play against, but this is clearly a one and done project.
You know what's funny? This reminds me of those old Newgrounds flash games from 2005, the ones where you'd click through a static image gallery disguised as a game. Same energy. Except those had more personality. At least this one has a real model, I guess. The striptease is the whole point, and it delivers on that one narrow promise. Just don't expect any depth. Or replay value. Or functional AI. The poker is so broken you could train a cat to beat it. But hey, blonde on a train. If that's your thing, you've already clicked the link.