The Raging Professor

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★ 4.2 (26 votes) 9.9K plays Flash Arcade

About this game

Professor Adam. What a fucking creep, honestly. And I mean that as a compliment to the game. He's got this whole mad scientist vibe going on, not the cool kind, more like the guy who definitely has questionable stains on his lab coat. The whole premise is he invents a liquid that stops time. You know, for science. Not for, like, the obvious thing. Except it's totally for the obvious thing. The game doesn't even pretend otherwise. You just click around his messy laboratory, and the first thing I noticed was how deliberately janky the whole interface feels. It's not broken, it's... a choice. Like the dev wanted you to feel a little grimy just by navigating it.

The first time I used the potion, I picked the professor's assistant. Big tits, obviously, because this game knows its audience. The animation is stiff, but there's something weirdly compelling about it. You click, and he just... goes to town. No resistance, no reaction. It's the silence that gets me. The world is frozen, so it's just the wet sounds and his grunting. It's less like sex and more like watching someone use a very elaborate, very unethical fleshlight. The humor is dark, buried in the item descriptions and the professor's muttering. He's so proud of his "secret formula," and you're just there, using it to see some tits. The contradiction is the whole point.

Spent way too long trying to click on a beaker in the background that looked slightly different. Nothing happened. That's the kind of game it is. You'll poke at things hoping for a secret, but it's pretty straightforward. The "big dick" tag is accurate, it's comically large, like a third leg. The stop time mechanic isn't some complex puzzle. You find a girl, you freeze the world, you do the deed. That's it. The writing for the professor's internal monologue is surprisingly funny, full of this misplaced academic pride. "Finally, I can conduct my research!" he says, while lining up his crotch with a frozen barista's face. The game knows it's trashy and leans in hard. Just click everything, even if it seems pointless. The best moments are the little absurd details, like the professor's notes on his "subjects." Don't expect a deep story. Expect to feel like you need a shower, and that's probably the intended effect.

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